Mommy Guilt

I had to run up to Trader Joe's on my lunch break today to pick up some cat food (who btw has great quality canned cat food, but that's neither here nor there) and I just can't be that close to Chick-Fil-A without being sucked in by the deliciousness.  So, I drove on over to the mall...  on a Friday...  during lunchtime...  But again, not my point. 

While racing through the food court to obtain my bliss on a bun, I saw mom after mom with their cute little kids.  And I felt it.  The pang of guilt that comes with leaving my daughter everyday to go to work.  And that wish that I was there instead with her...

I know that she is in great hands with her dad or grandma while I'm out earnin'.  However, that doesn't change the fact that I had always hoped that I could be a permanent stay at home mom.  But this is what I need to do for my family right now.

So, I'm focusing on all the positive aspects of working.  How much I appreciate my time with her in the evenings.  The much needed respite from constant toddler chatter.  And of course the money.  Damn the need for money.  Sometimes I'd love to move off the grid and farm our own food and make our own clothes.  Then I remember that our veggie garden only yielded a boat-load of cayenne peppers.  Hmmm...  I don't think we'll be homesteading anytime soon...